Trump's Greenlanding

The Trump Effect strikes again! Mere hours after President-elect Donald J. Trump took to his his social media platform, Truth Social, during the holidays, to declare that America's "ownership and control of Greenland is an absolute necessity," the Kingdom of Denmark unveiled a new $1.5 billion plan to defend its long-neglected, autonomous territory. Danish Defence Minister Troels Lund Poulsen claimed that the timing was merely an "irony of fate." But government announcements don't make themselves. Army Major Steen Kjaergaard of the Danish Defence Academy told the BBC that Trump's "renewed" attention on the arctic island and "internal developments in Greenland" favoring the United States spurred the dithering Danes to action. They may be too late.

Trump's Greenlanding
Illustration: Lev Kaplan

Also spurred on by Trump's renewed attention is Greenland's own prime minister, Mute Egede. The firebrand greeted the new year with a public vow to free his country from its Danish "shackles." And while Greenlanders may oppose Trump's green new deal, Erik Jensen, chairman of the Siumut Party, reassures that "we would like to emphasize that Trump is more than welcome to visit Greenland."

For now, Donald Trump, Jr., will have to suffice as Trump Sr. prepares for his inauguration on January 20th. The former and future First Son touched down in Nuuk, Greenland's capital, on Tuesday, to film scenes for his podcast, "Triggered with Don Jr." Trump Sr., meanwhile, promises to "MAKE GREENLAND GREAT AGAIN!"