‘You ain’t seen nothin’ yet!’

Prince Andrew is tangled up in the Epstein scandal. Prince Charles holds apocalyptic climate speeches. And Harry and Meghan took four private jets in eleven days after a summer of lecturing us about climate change. The Queen must surely wonder, as she prays each night, what on earth she has done to deserve such a useless shower of selfish show-offs.

In 1992, a speech the Queen gave looking back at that year referred to it as her ‘annus horribilis’ - year of disaster. During it, the Prince of Wales separated from Diana, who in turn co-operated over a ‘biography’ which was revealed to be more autobiography, portraying herself quite reasonably as the betrayed victim of a heartless cad and his cold family. Prince Andrew’s wife, Sarah Ferguson, was all over the media having her toes sucked by her ‘financial adviser’. On top of all that, Windsor Castle almost burned down leaving her with a £36.5 million repair bill.

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